You have just poured the host a taste of a bottle he chose himself and paid a lot of money for. He wrinkles his nose, hands the glass back and says, "Something's wrong with that." Ten people are watching. What you do in the next twenty seconds is the whole lesson.
The Faults You Will Meet
| Fault | Cause | Signs |
|---|---|---|
| Cork taint (TCA) | The compound 2,4,6-trichloroanisole, usually from the cork | Wet cardboard, damp cellar, mouldy newspaper. Fruit is stripped out; the wine tastes muted and short. Harmless, but undrinkable |
| Oxidation | Too much oxygen — bad seal, old, or left open | Whites go deep gold/brown; reds go brick. Sherry, bruised apple, nutty, flat |
| Reduction | Too little oxygen in winemaking | Struck match, rubber, burnt tyre, boiled cabbage. Often blows off with decanting or vigorous swirling |
| Heat damage ("maderised") | Stored too warm — a real risk on yachts | Cooked/stewed fruit, flat. Cork may be pushed proud of the lip or seeping |
| Refermentation | Unwanted yeast/bacteria in bottle | Unexpected slight fizz in a still wine, cloudy |
| Volatile acidity (VA) | Acetic bacteria | Nail-varnish remover, vinegar. Tiny amounts are normal; obvious VA is a fault |
Not faults: tartrate crystals (harmless "wine diamonds" on the cork or in the bottle base), sediment in an old red, and a small amount of reduction that blows off.
Handling It in Front of the Guest
- Never argue. Even if you think the wine is sound, the guest's perception is what matters.
- Say quietly: "Of course — let me check it and bring you another bottle."
- Remove the glass and the bottle from the table immediately. Do not leave the offending bottle in view.
- Taste it yourself away from the table so you know what actually happened, and log it.
- Bring a fresh bottle of the same wine, present it and re-taste from the beginning. If it is the last bottle, tell the host discreetly and offer a close alternative you have already thought of.
- Retain the faulted bottle and cork — the supplier or importer may credit it, and the chief stew or purser will need them.
Recording It
Every faulted bottle goes in the wine log: date, wine, vintage, supplier, suspected fault. If several bottles from the same case are heat-damaged, that is a storage or shipping problem for the yacht to raise, and it may point to a failing wine fridge you need fixed now.
Onboard Notes
- Heat damage is the yacht fault. Wine stored in a lazarette, a hot pantry, or a wine fridge running warm will cook. Check fridge temperatures daily and log them.
- Screwcaps do not get TCA. They can still oxidise or reduce.
- A guest who "sends back" a sound wine simply because they dislike the style is not entitled to a free replacement in a restaurant — but you are not in a restaurant. Onboard, replace it, note the preference, and move on.
- Never pour a faulted bottle for crew or use it for cooking without checking with the chief stew — it may be going back to the supplier as evidence.