Last month you were the second stew, sharing a cabin with the girl who is now your junior and complaining about the Chief with the rest of them. This morning you have to tell that same friend her cabins are being rushed, and this evening you have to hold the whole team to standard on day twenty-two of a six-week charter. Nobody is going to make this comfortable for you.
Giving feedback that changes behaviour
Feedback fails when it is vague, delayed, or aimed at the person rather than the act. A workable structure:
- Situation — when and where: "In the master cabin this morning."
- Behaviour — what you observed, factually: "The bathroom glasses were not replaced and the mirror was streaked."
- Impact — the consequence: "The guest saw it before we did, and the chief officer had to apologise."
- Ask — their account, genuinely: "What happened?"
- Agree — the fix and the check.
Praise uses the same structure and is worth far more when it is specific. "Great job" is noise; "you caught the allergy note on the preference sheet before service, which stopped a serious problem" is currency.
Receiving feedback
Your reaction to criticism sets the department ceiling on honesty. Listen without defending, ask for an example, thank the person, and act on it visibly. A HOD who argues with feedback will never receive any again — and will therefore never learn that the crew think the rota is unfair, or that a stew is being bullied.
Motivation and morale on a long charter
Money is a hygiene factor: its absence demotivates, its presence does not motivate for long. What sustains a crew through week five:
| Driver | How you supply it onboard |
|---|---|
| Autonomy | Ownership of a system; freedom over method |
| Mastery | Training, cross-training, a genuine skill learned |
| Purpose | Explaining why the standard matters to the guest and the yacht |
| Recognition | Specific, timely, sometimes in front of the Master |
| Fairness | Rotas, leave, cabins and time off distributed transparently |
| Rest | Protecting rest hours, guarding a real break |
Small things carry disproportionate weight: a proper meal off the pass, thirty minutes of daylight, a shore run, knowing when the charter actually ends.
Leading peers after promotion
- Reset the relationship explicitly, once, in a one-to-one. Do not pretend nothing has changed.
- Be consistent from day one. Favouring your friend, or over-correcting them to prove you are impartial, both destroy your credibility.
- Stop complaining sideways. You now represent the decision, even when you argued against it in private.
- Accept that some friendships will change. That is the cost of the role.
Onboard Notes
- Correct in private, praise in public, and never discipline within earshot of a guest.
- Formal warnings and grievances have a defined procedure in your SMS and Seafarer Employment Agreement. Follow it precisely and record it.
- Never buy morale with rest hours. Letting a tired crew work through their rest to earn goodwill is a regulatory breach and a safety risk.